the big 25!!!

its my birthday!!!!

i've been so overwhelmed with the love i've received so far, shed a few tears and all the mushiness I'm not known for. And my nieces made me love them more by calling and singing to me. Above all i've been so excited about the prayers that have been said for me by more than one person, they all go in one direction, that's a confirmation of the promises i have.

there's no parry today, although a friend is throwing one on Friday, so i'll be there. And typical me, I'd rather stay home.

25 is the new number. Half way to fifty, depending on how I'm viewing the glass. its a new season.

where do i see myself in five years time? that's the golden question i hate to answer. I'm done with all the fancy answers that make people so impressed. the truth is i don't know. It’s not because i’m not ambitious, its far from it, its because words cant describe what i imagine, and from experience I know that the imagination always turns out to be less than the reality, no matter how colorful the imagination may be. Thus its best left unsaid. In other words...i expect the great unexpected.

the latter will surely be greater than the past 25years.

loads of stuff have been thrown my way to make me stop and think, and I’ve realized that I'm more than what I've always seen myself to be. I am an oil field of potential and I’m extremely blessed.These past few months of seemingly idleness has been my exploration period. Oil will soon be stuck and the drilling would begin.

It takes but rushing out to get Tylenol from the drug store around the corner, to attending a cocktail to going out with friends to the beach, to smiling back at the stranger in church to take me to an unexpected and worthwhile path, these random people I meet are certainly not random, cos somehow an opportunity comes out from it all. I'm not the smartest girl in the planet, or the prettiest, of the best educated but like uncle Solomon says

"I have observed something else in this world of ours. The fastest runner doesn’t always win the race, and the strongest warrior doesn’t always win the battle. The wise are often poor, and the skillful are not necessarily wealthy. And those who are educated don’t always lead successful lives. It is all decided by chance, by being at the right place at the right time.” ecclesiastics 9:11 

Somehow these random people know someone who knows someone and there I am knowing the other someone who knows someone. I just happen to be at the right place at the right time. i call that favor, i call that grace...I hope to keep climbing the ladder, keep walking towards the light. Gods been with me, he's worked on me in ways so mysterious, on the other side of 25, he gave me some major breakthroughs which i misused, but he used them to teach me lessons. I'm glad i went through all those issues, cos its better to be a young fool than an old fool. i know not to make the same mistakes. He knows the plans he has for me thus who am i to tell him what to expect in five years? I can only voice out what I hope my expected end will be, I refuse to short change myself by naming places so low in the ladder. i.e Say a food hawker cries to God for a stall in the market, when Gods plan for her is to own a restaurant in some nice part of town. I refuse to set a standard that is so short of what God has in store for me. 
five years from now? i’d be closer to the light, close enough to see my path and know where the next perfect turn leads. settled with my husband and kids,doing that which the maker has placed in my heart to do and doing it well, I hope to be highly successful, through what deal or in what field, I know not. who knows? When he pushes me right, i go right even though i see more gold at the left. what can i say, he's God, he's got to know what he's doing. He's the one who's promised an expected end, thus he knows how to get me there and everyone else who sets their sight on him.

I can't paint pictures of expectations, i don't have the right colors. the canvas may seem bare now, but who says that's not the whole idea. i am a vessel, grooming and waiting to be made into what i ought to be.

happy birthday to me.