who am i?

"I write for the unlearned about things in which I am unlearned myself." - CS Lewis, Reflections on the Psalms

Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Boobies... Suckle... Worship!


I’ve been reading about breastfeeding.
It’s left me in awe at how awesome God is. Before we thought of formulas, a world that would get so busy for mothers to stay home and breastfeed, He put all a baby would need in the mother’s breast. Every nutrient for every stage of the baby’s life is available. The mother has everything her baby needs to grow up healthy and build his/her system in her.
Breast milk has the perfect combination of proteins, fats, vitamins, and carbohydrates.  There is nothing better for the health of your baby.  Leukocytes are living cells that are only found in breast milk.

I read that a mum’s breast milk changes to meet the baby’s need. This happens because when babies suckle, a vacuum is created which enables the infant’s saliva to get into the mothers nipples. Here, the mammary glad receptors then interprets the baby’s spit backward for bacteria and viruses and if they detect something amiss i.e. the child is sick or fighting an infection, the moms body changes the milks immunological composition, tailoring it to the baby’s particular virus by producing customized antibodies.
A 2013 clinical and translational immunology study found that when a baby is ill, the numbers of leukocytes (a colorless cell that circulates in the blood and body fluids and is involved in counteracting foreign substances and disease; a white (blood) cell.) in its mothers breast spike.

In other words, when a baby is ill, the breast milk picks signals and changes to the antidote for what the baby needs at that moment. The milk produced from nursing a baby with a cold resembles colostrum, which is the super milk full of antibodies and leukocytes women make during the first few days after birth.

All these goodies in the breast, babies are sure having a ball!
Now back to the main the main, the reason for the breast talk, or boobies’ as my dearest dearest six-year old niece Michelle would say with mischief.

EL SHADDAI .. Almighty, All Sufficiency, the Breasted One. He meets all our needs. All Consuming Judge, to sweep away or make desolate .. Gen 17:1; Ps91:1; 81:10

The bible refers to God as the many breasted one.

All breasted one… The All-sufficient one.

In Him is everything… EVERYTHING you need.

The one who nurtures you like a mother nurtures her babe.
We are all children of God… it doesn’t matter if you’re a hundred and two or a day old… and that qualifies us as his kids to suckle on Him.

And as every nutrient a child needs to grow, to build up the immune system etc. is contained in the mothers breast, everything we need to be all we’re called to be in this world, to live victorious etc is contained in God!

Latch on to him exclusively.
Suckle on His love and grace.
Just like the baby’s saliva sends a signal, when a need comes… even before you call, from your sucking, a signal is sent up, and a solution, an antidote is given… right in the sucking.
Seek ye first the kingdom of God and everything other thing is added… taken care of.

Isn’t God just so beautiful in all His ways? How He presents Himself to us and mirrors just what He’s like in the life of a mother and her newborn baby. He gives us a picture of the nurturing love that He has for us.

The beauty of our God. … our ALL in ALL. The I am that I am… meaning all that we need Him to be, He is for us. Provider when needed, a friend, lover of our souls… comforter, helper…. Counselor.
When you’re lied on, cheated on… treated badly… you’ll suck on Him and He’ll sooth you with the nutrient you need to be strengthened in that place of hurt, He’ll be your defense.
When you’re confused, at a loss of what to do… He’ll be your helper, your counselor.
When you’re in danger, in the valley of the shadow of death… He’ll be your guide; His rod and staff would comfort you and give you boldness.


As we suckle on His grace, the antidote for every situation we face is provided.
As we suckle, a signal is given and all that we lack, all that we desire is given.

There’s a flow of milk as long as a child keeps sucking… and it is always a relieve for the mother for this milk to flow. You can’t receive all that God has for you if you’re not sucking. There’s all that provision, but there is no flow, because you just wouldn’t receive, and His boobs (sounds weird to say) is heavy, desiring a release to you, it gives Him joy to see you receive from Him.

How do we receive? How do we suck on this love of our God? Suck on the many breasted one… the all sufficient one? In the place of worship!
In worship, we just draw and draw and draw from Him. Worship, praise, prayer… just spending time with Him.
Be the child of God that you are… spend time with your Daddy who mothers you, and enjoy all that he desires for His children to have.

“… God wants more than an experience with you; He wants a relationship.
When you have a relationship with God, He will reveal Himself to you. He will give you more than just success; He will give you significance. He will teach you how to master the gifts He has placed in you and only then will the world move over and make space for you.” Paul Adefarasin

Have a relationship with Him…. spend time with Him… feed on Him!

Wednesday, June 7, 2017

On Mosquitoes and Insomnia...

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Inability to sleep… insomnia is the glamorized name. like they took that hideous ordinary looking discomfort and gave it a make over… dressed it in a ball gown and suddenly gave it status, and made you feel like it's not so bad if you use its royal name. Glam bam wide awake… Lady insomnia is keeping you company.

I have no problem with staying up at night. I love it. I come alive at night… typical me is drifting off to sleep at 4am, fulfilled, happy and not frustrated at being up so late, because some times I even make myself stay up… sometimes I try to push myself, I’m up living as the queen of the night time till the sun comes out and when the hustle and bustle of activities for the day begins, that’s when I tuck in and just float over to a beautiful comatose… or semi-comatose because I hear when the phone rings at 8am or 9am, someone who’s had hours of hours of a good night sleep feeling its okay to call, and when I by reflex groggily answer the call that ends up being a total waste of time and an annoying interruption, they think aha ah… you’re still sleeping at this time? You’re enjoying oh… and in that sound, I hear an undertone of lazy lazy lazy… you’re so lazy. But I really don’t care, as long as I’m productive all through the night, then keep your thoughts and maybe your calls to yourself, at least give me till 10am. I love my beauty sleep….

But you see, it becomes a problem when you don’t feel like being creative at night, you’ve prayed and then its almost 2am and as you snuggle in, the artificial darkness collides with the natural… there’s a power cut, and the generator is faulty. So you figure… it rained, the weathers cool, you can sleep off... only to close your eyes and wham! The monsters of the night start marauding. They are tiny, but not tiny enough to ignore. Close to the ears they zoom past with an annoying buzz. I find myself slapping myself so hard it feels like I’m doing a self-flagellation on myself like those monks. I hit my ears really hard, it dinged, I thought I may have burst my eardrums. I figured something out about those little evil suckers… most times I slap a spot and aggressively scratch, they have bitten and are long long gone before I attack myself… and the moment I gently rub my hands on my shoulder or any part of my body sometimes, something sticky is felt… blimey, I just killed one and it was a fat one, fat on my blood, taking a lazy nap on my shoulders/body and I had no idea. You only feel their bite long after they’re gone, so stop with the self harm by slapping yourself so hard in the bid to kill them.

Now I can’t sleep. Nothing frustrates me as much as mosquitoes, i remember as a child doing the exact same thing, being frustrated and looking for them kill. I pray for the light to be restored, that would keep them away… I hate the idea of insecticides because it causes allergies for me, and I end up spending the night puffing on inhalers. I put on the torch on my ipod and launch a search for mosquitoes, I might as well fight a battle if they would keep me awake, I hunt them out and kill as many as I find, it gives me a satisfaction that I have fired my own ammunition against them, even though they burst to death with my own blood. My friend says if mosquitoes decide to do a pay back, I’d be in trouble, because they would all troop to my room for all their comrades I have killed. I’d be ready for them.

And so I am forced to stay awake, because the moment I close my eyes, those terrors are close to my ears. I asked God why He created those petite, little monsters… and I thought to myself, maybe they weren’t meant to torment us so, maybe they play a part in the environment, and maybe the fall of man that distorted the way things were to be, unleashed their senselessness to attack the ones who have dominion over them.
I stay on instagram, liking relevant and irrelevant pictures, I try to pray at the same time, I read FIN stories, and slap myself at intervals and cringe at the giant shadows the light from my phone makes of them. I try writing, but my laptop battery is almost out.

Its 5am and I really do want to sleep, but they haven’t retired for the night… its 7am, the light from outside trickles in, they fizzle out… its 8am, power is restored, I close my eyes to sleep… its 9am, my phone beeps with an important call that cannot be ignored, and that call forces me to shower and drive out, it takes me out of the house for about an hour. Its 12:15pm, I’m in bed, snuggled in to sleep, but I have my stay the path book by Bobbie Houston by my side, I have my laptop open writing this. I am sleepy, I am tired from my battle with the mosquitoes, I'm a bit grouchy... I may have snapped at my mum. I need to sleep, but here I am, insomnia being real to me. The craziness of sleeplessness.
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