who am i?

"I write for the unlearned about things in which I am unlearned myself." - CS Lewis, Reflections on the Psalms

Thursday, July 28, 2016

Keep Walking... This is not a Johnnie Walker Ad

My little cousin DJ was operated on last weekend. It was simple enough to be done as an outpatient procedure. The procedure was to correct an umbilical hernia. It was an uncomplicated surgery, but I felt anxiety, especially as general anesthetic was going to be administered on the little four year old … it didn’t help that I had the flu and I was probably hallucinating in my apprehension from the fever it brought.

A photo posted by Joy Akut (@inyamuakut) on

The surgery was successful thank God!
He was in pains when he was fully conscious and restless/confused at what must have happened to him, especially with the big scary looking plaster on his stomach. We reassured him that he’d be fine, and since he was an outpatient case; he was taken home that night.
He couldn’t/wouldn’t get up for anything, he had to be carried to the bathroom if he was in the mood to indicate his desire to pee, but if he didn’t, he freely peed on his mum and the bed with no care in the world, and no one was mad at him for doing that. He didn’t set a foot on the ground that Saturday, neither did he on Sunday, and not even on Monday when he was taken to the hospital for checkup and dressing. He was carried into the hospital that evening, like a fragile egg… notice I said fragile egg… eggs are already fragile, but a fragile egg is… You get my point I believe.

After his consultation, the doctor amusedly asked why DJ wasn’t walking…. Doc even said homeboy could run if he wanted to. The doctor held his hands and walked with him, and he walked gently at first, then he picked up pace, and so the boy we didn’t allow to set foot on the ground walked to the car.
I understand that he didn’t totally understand what he went through and so was scared to move at his normal pace, he had gone through something and was unsure of what it was like to function normally. Even we the adults were scared of letting him be because we weren’t sure of what the healing process was like, we assumed he shouldn’t be walking after the procedure and didn’t attempt to make him walk. We were used to seeing patients remain on hospital beds for days after surgery and not walking around. I had a good laugh at how ignorant we were and how we treated him so fragile when he could be himself already… how our fear probably fueled his fear, and same time increased his pleasure at being extra pampered so much that he stopped himself from being himself, being cradled and carried in your mums arms always is much better than walking after all. God used what happened to him to show me a little something that happens with we humans.

Many of us are like my cousin DJ.  We go through something unpleasant in life, like he went through surgery and then refuse to walk again, thinking we’re too hurt to even move, too betrayed to trust again, to scarred to smile again, too heartbroken to laugh again. Its time to put your foot on the ground, you can move, you can not just walk, you can run if you want to…. The pain isn’t deep enough to cripple you. Who has the power to hurt you deep enough to cripple your life, put it on hold, halt it? Who have you given that power to? You’re so wrong for that, but I’m not beating you down for not knowing better…. I’m encouraging you, take your life back. Put your feet down and walk. A divorce isn’t the end of your life. A failed business shouldn’t take away your passion and desire for success. Being raped can't stop you. Failing a course again isn’t a recipe for giving up and wallowing in self-pity. Who’s your Daddy? Why would you, a child of God let challenges cripple you?

Or is it something you did that’s so bad you cant get yourself over it? What did the bible say about falling and rising again? (Proverbs 24:16) It’s talking about you. Sin has no dominion over you. Yes you fell, rise up… that’s what makes you not just a Christian, but also a child of God; your ability to rise above your mistakes no matter how many times you make it, because God loves you and forgives you always. Put your foot down and walk. Its not so bad that God has banished you from walking in life. Walk boldly into His throne room and obtain mercy baby girl(Hebrews 4:16). Your condemnation of self is what’s crippling you brother.
God says there is no condemnation in Him (Romans 8:1)… meaning you can walk, so why are you bedridden in your guilt and shame? Like Joyce Meyer said “Condemnation weakens us and we keep making the same errors over and over.”
You’re only hurting yourself when you refuse to rise up from the ashes. And like my aunt had to suffer the consequences of being soaked in pee and lifting the heavy little man because he was not walking, your loved ones are suffering the consequences of your decision to lie there…. Peeing on yourself and just messing yourself up.
The longer you stay there stagnant, covered in guilt and wallowing in self pity, the longer you miss out on full recovery and the joy of new beginnings, the joy of knowing the love of the Lord being renewed every morning for you.
God’s loyal love couldn’t have run out,
    his merciful love couldn’t have dried up.
They’re created new every morning.
    How great your faithfulness!
I’m sticking with God (I say it over and over).
    He’s all I’ve got left. Lamentation 3:22-24
(MSG)

Start walking, you may be too scared to hit the ground running, even though I promise you that you can, but you can start one step at a time… that’s progress, any progress is good news right?

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