who am i?

"I write for the unlearned about things in which I am unlearned myself." - CS Lewis, Reflections on the Psalms

Tuesday, April 8, 2014

Road Trip...


Driving with my mum is ‘interesting’. She sits and everything is fine till she stops in the middle of a nice conversation and gently exclaims, “Watch it”. That pisses me off.
“Don’t go”… of course I’m not going mother, I’m watching as much as you are and I can see a speeding car coming. Or she goes “wait” even when I can go, the road is clear and the trailer is miles awayyyy. I can go dear mother, I cherish my life as much as you cherish yours and mine.

My mum is apprehensive when I drive her (now that's funny, because I attempt to be gentle with potholes when she’s in the car, my body aches from being extra careful for her sake, but I guess, I’m never careful enough with her)
Its amusing how on the other hand, she comfortably sits home and sends me to a dozen places without baiting an eyelid.
Sometimes she throws in a “be careful” if its on an extremely busy road.
I wonder how come she trusts me to drive safe when I’m alone. She trust me to “watch it” and “wait” and “move out of the way” on my own, but when she’s in with me… that trust is broken.

You see, I’m like my mum today. I have been able to encourage people and tell them it’s aright, trusting God for them, and believing God will do it without having to ask Him or bug Him. I send them off in the car God is driving, on that road trip, trusting they’ll be all right, trusting God will know when to “watch out” and “go slow” in their lives. I sit comfortably at home as I send them along saying “don’t worry, God is in control… it is well” and knowing deep within that it really is, because I know just how good God is.
It’s that easy.

My mum hasn’t been feeling well for a little while now. Today, I’m riding in the car with God. It’s my turn and like mum, as much as I trust Him to take those who come to me safely on their journey, I still feel the urge to try to control Him as He drives me. I know He’s the best driver ever… I know what His word says. I know all is well, because right in this vehicle, I have seen how ill my mum was and I see her taking recovery steps that can only be God. But I fiddle with my prayers. I just can’t seem to sit back and relax like I do when I’m not in the car. I want Him to “go now“speed up” go past the traffic light. "Could you do this a little faster Lord? I know you’re a perfect driver, but I just have to speed you up on this drive. I know I can trust you, but I really don’t want to be here this long. I want to see the finished works of her healing right now. I have the word, but I need the manifestation right now." That's how I've felt for so long. I literally got sick with worry, lost do much weight, because I chose being a nagging passenger, instead of relaxing on the ride.

I know it is well… it’s all down at His feet. Thank God that He is more patient with me than I am with mum when she tries to control the way I drive. He gently comforts me when I interrupt, I’m thankful He never snaps at me even as much as I know how annoying trying to make the driver drive my way is annoying. I have learned to sit back and relax and even when I hit the imaginary accelerator with my feet, trying to use some telepathy to control His movement because I want Him to go faster. His ways are better than mine, His pace better and He knows how best to handle my deepest burdens. He’s given His word, It’s taken a few weeks but we’re here, so deep into recovery, it can only be God! 

“I don’t think the way you think.
The way you work isn’t the way I work.”
God’s Decree.
“For as the sky soars high above earth,
so the way I work surpasses the way you work,
and the way I think is beyond the way you think.
Just as rain and snow descend from the skies
and don’t go back until they’ve watered the earth,
Doing their work of making things grow and blossom,
producing seed for farmers and food for the hungry,
So will the words that come out of my mouth
not come back empty-handed.
They’ll do the work I sent them to do,
they’ll complete the assignment I gave them
Isaiah 55:8-11(MSG)


Whatever you’re trusting God for, whatever word He’s given that you’re holding on to, keep trusting. His words never return to Him void, they do their work and go back with the rejoicing of our heart. It is His good pleasure to bless us and grant us the desires of our heart. Remember that in all your worries. God is the best driver to go on a road trip with. I would willingly go on a hundred road trips with God as my driver than go on a smooth ride without Him behind the wheels.

10 comments :

  1. God bless you for this! I love the way you write and the way you draw deep messages from simple every day occurences..
    I need to remember to let go and let God! I also thank Him for His patience with me when I get quite (very) iffy! lol

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  2. And I also pray for your mum, that God will heal her completely and make her well in Jesus name xx

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  3. I pray your mom gets well soon. Take care..

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  4. Amen Ayo. I love this message. It's def for me :)

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  5. It is amazing how the word trust has just five letters but its a big deal. As a wife and a mom, I have had trust issues....but over the years I have learnt to drop it at his feet. And as I watch things happen, and the way they do gives me a positive view about life. I pray for healing for your mom. God bless you both.

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  6. Great mothers are so alike in many ways....God bless your mum and mine and I believe God is perfecting her healing already.

    love your blog...wanna follow eachother?
    let me know
    www.mystyleorgy.blogspot.com

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