who am i?

"I write for the unlearned about things in which I am unlearned myself." - CS Lewis, Reflections on the Psalms

Monday, March 12, 2012

Local defector...


I know I’ve openly declared myself to be a local girl, but if you've planned on taking me to bukas for dates… desist or have your face splashed with the pure water we will be served with.
So I say I’m a local girl, but even the village girls are known to defect sometimes, especially after having a taste of the good life. i.e Ada Amaka had a crush on the local palm wine tapper because he owned a bicycle. She visits the neighboring village for the first time and Obinna the shoe maker who’s her aunts neighbor gives her a lift to the market on his motor bike… well levels don change for Ada Amaka, she suddenly wants nothing to do with the palm wine tapper and his bicycle. Life on a motor bike sure beats life on a bicycle.
Growing up, mum would take me to the market to have my hair weaved while she went shopping. Dropping me with those women was a nightmare. I sat on tiny stools, my head bent in every direction unimaginable and the worst of all, in the scorching heat, our body’s all sweaty, some mama Friday would stick my head between her legs all in the name of making didi… you can't imagine the stink.
Well, I grew up and started going to saloons with AC’s and coffee and tea and cold drinks. My nieces don’t have their heads in death trap positions, they’re offered sodas and cakes and they’re petted, their hair handled with care… Now, do you think even in my localness, I want to ever go back to seating on low stools in market places to weave my hair after tasting the good life? :)
Braiding my hair in Onikan kind of reminds me of those days, even though the conditions are relatively better. I decided to go to Onikan one fine day to braid my hair, not entirely because I was too broke for elaborate salon visits, where you have to tip ten more peeps in addition to the girl who styled your hair; you tip the tea boy, you tip the one who washed your hair, the one who comes to gist with you and lovingly ask after the kids/family/nieces, the one who comes every five minutes and says as loud as she can ‘aunty your hair is fine’; the one who paints just a toe nail… the guard who helps park the car. The tipping money alone would pay for my hair in Onikan.
Anyways, I wanted beautiful braids and I wanted it cheap and so Onikan it was. A cluster of little saloons where everyone sits outside to get their hair done. That is after you have used up all energy trying to find appropriate parking, because there is no one to bully to get you parking space. I’m paying ten times less than the regular salons. It’s always almost like a steal when i go there, I almost feel guilty, but I don’t.:p
I sit making my hair and some lady comes and offers to give me a manicure and pedicure… I let her, and her pedicure is just too good, and she fixes one of the best nail extensions i've ever had, my nails looked so beautiful.
It was a relief being in a salon where you can be yourself in comfort, without feeling like you’re committing a felony for being you. No one’s being nice to you just because of the amount you’re paying, the girls are real. But even with knowing what I know, I’ll still be going back to the salons… Because I love the fact that I drive in and there’s a place to park, if not, someone’s going to look for one for me. I love the cool AC on me while my hair is been made, and I can scream about a fly/cockroach and jump around and make others who probably live with flies and cockroaches like me, scream too. I love to seat on the massage seats, relaxed while getting a pedicure. I love having the TV on and a clean rest room available if i need one. I love it when my scalp is massaged tenderly after every wash, and I love the insincere treatment I get, like I’m the best thing since sliced bread, even though I know I’ll be paying for every compliment and every smile.
I love that my bum isn’t paralyzed from seating on a hard low stool, and I can dictate what I want and have them loosening when I feel I don’t like it… try it with the Onikan girls and I have a feeling they’ll pounce on you and beat you up :). I remember once giving the diva attitude when the saloon girls were almost half way through with my hair, I hated the way the braids looked, and I was ready to walk, they pleaded and pleaded, hurriedly loosened it and started all over again to my satisfaction. I noticed something like that in Onikan and i complained, the punishment i got for that was mean... those girls made the hair so tight, i almost passed out.
I came out looking well groomed and pretty like i just stepped out of some island saloon.  Be it in onikan or the nail place… as long as you come out looking nice, no one really cares where your hair was made. But even in all my localness, when I’m in a place where I have a choice, I’d rather pick comfort over convenience. Here's a toast to my ability to acclimate easily to the posh side.
(Onikan is my every once in a while go to place.)

P.S With salvation, it doesn’t matter how you get there, through the back streets, or the Posh salons, as long as you come out looking great. Some were ‘born’ saved, others were handed salvation through the dim halls of brothels, on high ways of robbery, drug induced haze and in pits of depression. It doesn't matter how you got saved or who you were in the past, what’s important is that you are saved. That's all that matters. Onikan or the island... who really cares? Just come out looking groomed.

15 comments:

  1. Someone was complaining of missing good ole personal blogging. Yours is one of them. love this :)

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    1. Lol, thanks Myne. I miss personal blogging too. But it doesn't get so interesting anymore when you're no more anonymous, you censor the good stuff out that it's nothing but 'stuff' just to avoid stepping on toes :(

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  2. I sincerely loved this post. It made me laugh. Sometimes it's good to experience both worlds. It increases gratitude. It strengthens humility. It's a good thing.

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    1. It sure is. Grass to Grace, and never wanting to leave Grace ever again.

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  3. Hahaha. I just love the analogy. Who cares? Whether your salvation required droplets or bucket loads of the blood of the lamb. As long as you're saved it's all good

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    1. YEAH!!!! Who cares? (but some people love to care o... )

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  4. You really tip that many people??? Are you sure I wont join them?

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    1. lol, the guilt i feel when i don't tip is almost so heavy, i feel a force following me when i drive off.(Of course i exaggerate to get my point across, but i sure do a lot of tipping)

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  5. LOL. My problem with onikan is the girls shouting and gisting and fighting like there is no tomorrow over your head.. that is why i'l rather go to the AC salon or even have home service

    Your post reminded me of mama kantuma the fulani woman that used to braid my hair

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    1. did she rub any of those oils on your hair? they one that makes theirs so long?
      Home service is convenient, but being at home makes me lazy, it's tempting to get up to go to the fridge, then to the bathroom, then to the room... just do unnecessary things to slow you down.

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  6. hmmmmm my name is a hair style? Interesting :)

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    1. ha ha, yes there is.. :P you shd be the face of didi :)

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  7. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  8. You know when they ask that questions ''which book do you wish you had written?''? Until today, never read a blog I wished I had written. I love so many of them like I did this one. But THIS one, I wish I had written. It's just brilliant especially cos I did not see the end bit coming at all. I 'feel you totally' on the posh/buka salon experiences....lol! But the best bit was how you ended it. It don't matter how you get there ; be Saul/Paul or be the theif hanging by Jesus that got into heaven by the skin of his teeth.....just get there!

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    1. Thank you for your kind words.

      isn't his grace amazing? giving the ragged out china white fabric same opportunity as the silks of the world... only Grace!!!

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