My mum handed over my ‘portion’ from grandmas’ things.
It was an emotional moment thinking about how her possessions had been shared. Grandma was so careful with her things and kept them safe and in good condition.
I was given a set of gold earrings and pendant, and with the nice and quite heavy weighty set, a lovely thick necklace to go with it, an outfit and a lovely purse.
All the items are valuable… but obviously the gold has a lot more monetary value than the others.
Amidst tears, I took my things… but gave the gold set back to mum to keep for me. I did that in condemnation to self.
I was thinking mum was judging me as she handed it over to me because all the gold set she’s ever bought me, not even one remains. And she did buy me some expensive pieces. To think how much they would be worth in today’s market. Not one, not the stud earrings, neither the heavy sets and chains… I don’t even have any of the gold sets I’ve bought for myself… from anklets, to heavy earrings and rings… nothing, not even daddy’s gold chain and pendant I had!
Missing, sold off, stolen and different stories… I felt she was thinking in her mind how careless I was with all the other sets and how I would probably do the same with this precious piece, that had more than monetary value…
I know she wasn’t thinking that. But that’s what self-condemnation does to you; you imagine the thoughts of everyone about you. So I acted all ‘wise’ and responsible by asking her to keep it for me, and talking about how I don’t have a safe place for it right now.
I took my other things away.
That incident showed me something.
Jesus died and our inheritance has been given… ALL things are ours.
But like me, our condemnation by our weaknesses, our carelessness and our mistakes keeps us from receiving. We pick out the one we feel we are kind of deserving… it’s a big deal, but not as big a deal as the next.
So we take health and leave wealth…
We take salvation and leave the blessings that come with it.
We’re thinking maybe we deserve to be sick because we didn’t take care of our bodies… we sinned. So lets leave the healing in a safe place and live with the little pains because God will probably judge us when we ask Him for healing… so we walk away with some other blessing that we feel we deserve.
We don’t take the wealth, because well, we don’t know how to manage money and God is angry with us… so lets leave the wealth and just live poor while we live with wisdom and good health. A poor, wise and healthy man… bleh!
Remember the blessing of the Lord makes rich and adds no sorrow. We are entitled to these blessings… all of it, no exception and this blessing does not come with a baggage of sorrow… What is sorrow? A direct response to condemnation! Condemnation brings about sorrow… the fact that you don’t deserve it, doesn’t mean the blessing isn’t given to you irrespective of what you feel and condemnation has no place in the blessing of God. He does not condemn you.
If He did, He wouldn’t waste time and the precious treasure of heaven on you. The cross happened to wipe the slate clean and position you to receive every good and perfect gift, to receive the great riches of His grace and mercy. For our sake He became poor that we may be rich, by His stripes we are made whole. Glory to God.
Its time to take all we’ve been bequeathed in Christ death… the inheritance is an all-encompassing blessing. Don’t settle for one and reject the other. Take it all, it is your Fathers good pleasure to see you enjoy every blessing He has made available for you. I’ve taken my gold and even started wearing it, because I know it’ll be a joy for her to see me enjoy it.